Melting into Spring
The song “Favorite Things” from the Sound of Music has always been a favorite of mine. I especially like the lyrics äbout silver-white winters that melt into spring. In New England, that line aptly describes cold sunny days with melting snow that smell like spring. With water jumping and trickling across fields and wood, there’s no mistaking a new season is near.
I read somewhere that when a loved one is ill, life becomes laser-focused on what’s truly important. All the things that we normally fret about – ice on the windshield in the morning again, the market out of the tea we want, and tax forms that haven’t arrived in time for the accountant’s appointment, fall to the wayside. Yes, all those things seem quite minor when someone you love is sick.
My mother has enjoyed good health all her life. I credit, in part, her natural mediterranean diet learned from her Italian grandmother, and the fact that although she has never exercised, she has always been active. But suddenly the week before Christmas, she became very ill.
I knew something was wrong when she called to ask for help wrapping her Christmas gifts. She said she had no energy. When I went to her house I could clearly see that she was lethargic and confused. She barely made our Christmas Day celebration and spent the afternoon watching the festivities from the sofa with a weak smile. That was the day before we found out she had pneumonia. One thing led to another and one doctor led to another and things improved. But then she fell. And broke her back.
This winter is nothing like last winter or any other winter I’ve known. My house doesn’t get its weekly dusting and I don’t have any time to call a new friend I met who really wants to get together. I’ve stopped writing and I’ve cut out all unnecessary work. These are the winter days that I want just one thing – for Mom to get better and go back to that fun-loving, smiling and funny lady I’ve known all my life.
Do I really have a right to expect this?, I ask myself. Afterall, my mother is in her 80’s and she has definitely reached a new level in her trip down Old Age Lane. But I’m selfish and ornery and I want her back…
So this winter, my sister and I are helping our mother with everything from bathing and dressing to bill-paying and hopefully adding levity and warmth into her somewhat darker world. When my phone rings and I know my sister has been with Mom, my heart skips a quick beat until I hear her say, “Mom’s having a good day!” That’s all we want. Our laser-like focus is on making sure she has what she needs and is safe and comfortable. And hopefully, this long winter will melt into a spring that brings better days with it.
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Thank you for the lovely comments I’ve been receiving on prior posts. I am committed to dipping back into my writing, here and other places. Look for another post very soon.
15 Comments
Stacey
These may not be the most fun times you will have together, but one day they will be treasured memories. Bless you and your sister for your care and devotion.
A Lovely Inconsequence
Thank you Stacey.
Margaret Powling
I am so sorry to hear of your other’s fall and her subsequent lethargy and confusion. You and your sister are doing all you an to help her, you can’t do more than that. I wish you, our sister and your mother all the very best; take comfort in the memory of all the lovely things she has done for you and your sister throughout her life. Forget the dust, your Mum takes priority right now. Sending hugs.
Margaret P
A Lovely Inconsequence
Thank you Margaret. So enjoy your blog.
Margaret Powling
Thank you, Donna.
LA CONTESSA
SO SORRY……….broke her back!!!!!!!!
YIKES!!!
XX
A Lovely Inconsequence
Truth!
Ann
Saw just the photo on your post and thought of the snowdrops I found poking up in our churchyard before services yesterday. Then I read your message. I check in on your blog regularly and knew it had been a little bit since you posted – so sorry to hear it was because of your mother’s illness. I hope she is doing better and will be soon back to good health. In the meantime…how wonderful that you and your sister are giving her loving care. What a gift. And, what a tribute to her that she raised you in a way that you know how to show her love and concern when she needs it. Your care is your love made visible. You, your sister, and especially your mother will be in my prayers. Blessings to you all !
A Lovely Inconsequence
I will accept your blessings Ann…thank you!
Christine McCann
I’m chiming in to pass along my hopes that your mother will recover her health and happy personality as you and your sister wish. As you said, a lot of things get dropped in the mean time, but they can all be dealt with or picked back up eventually. Christie
A Lovely Inconsequence
Thank you Christine…
Elizabeth
Bless you for putting your life on hold to help your mom!! Wishing you all the best and that she will heal soon and be back to her normal self!!
Lori
I hope your mother gets better soon. Taking care of our loved ones is an exhausting task, so remember to take a little care for yourself too.
Donna Nance
This is a lovely post about caring for your sweet mom. I will add her and you and your sister to my prayer list and will pray that she continues to heal.
Kay
Ah, bless you. ❤️ You are doing your best for your mum and looking after her in the way she looked after you when you were little. I doubt whether her home back then was dusted as often as she would have liked! 😉
My parents are elderly and are in need of help. Unfortunately, my husband and I can only give limited practical help, i.e. driving them to medical appointments. However, God has blessed us in that we are in a position to help them out financially. This means they can pay for help.
It is such a blessing to see my children, nephews & nieces and my sister stepping up to looking after mum & dad.
This is a new season for us all and the way our family is coordinating help & care is a beautiful outpouring of love.