Bravery Becomes Us
“You’re very brave”, my mother told me the day I had to have my fingernail removed at the doctor’s office. I’ll spare you the details but I had an infection that wouldn’t be cured by daily baptisms in hot water with Epsom Salts and when we returned to the doctor’s, he announced rather matter-of-factually, that the nail would have to come off that hour.
I don’t remember crying as I had complete trust in grown-ups at the time. My mother stayed with me during the ordeal and I caught her wincing a few times. Still, it was over quickly and a splint with large white bandages was applied and we headed home.
It was in the car that my mother turned to me and said how courageous I had been and her stricken face told me that I was doing better than she was. Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to live up to the simply-stated honor she bestowed on me. I didn’t complain when I couldn’t go into our backyard pool with the other kids and I convalesced as best I could with my bulky finger. Soon the incident became nothing more than a What-I-did-Over-the-Summer essay and in September when I entered third grade, all that was left was a funny squared-off nail on my ring finger which persists today in a milder form.
At this time of national crisis, to write about fashion or perfume would seem to take away the seriousness of the times we are in and I just can’t. Instead, I’m thinking about the strength of the heroines I’ve known or ones I have read about in books. What of my great grandmothers who fled Italy, Lithuania, and Scotland with nothing but a baby in their arms and a basket with all their possessions at their feet? They always seem to be on my mind…
I also recall the pioneer women who traveled with new husbands to the west where they were met with lives of terror and hardship. I think of our homefront mothers who carried on alone during air raids and rationing and what of the valiant London women and mothers who lived normal lives by day and endured the Blitzkrieg bombings at night? All brave and all rising to the occasion not just because they wanted to, but because they wouldn’t allow themselves to do anything else.
Right now, we are not being bombed but we are definitely being threatened. So many of my friends are sad and have said that they are waiting for the other shoe to drop. We are trying hard to stay safe and healthy while the world swirls around us with ever-changing alliances and threats. And when we are finally vaccinated, we have no idea what life will be like – collectively, we may all have post traumatic stress syndrome which will require even more grit.
Once my mother told me how brave I was, I felt a stirring that made me feel I would survive even if I couldn’t swim that summer. I wore my stiff-upper-lip well, just as I am doing now. And when I don’t feel it, I get going anyway. What’s that expression – “Get the body moving, and the mind will follow”? That concept is actually scientifically proven. When we put one foot in front of the other and do what we must do, we become stronger as our minds follow our bodies into battle. How many times have we washed the dishes even when we didn’t feel like it only to find the tangled threads in our brains loosen and relax as the warm soapy water rushes over our hands?
So I am writing to tell you that you are all very brave. And it becomes you very much.
16 Comments
Bruce Caissie
My Grandmothers through the years were the Same, from the begining of living in the (Acadie)Maritimes of Canada keeping their families together through the Deportation of them from their lands English Governors of Nova Scotia and Massachusetts committed. My families travel back to their lands, then in the 20’s because of lack of employment in Canada they settled in Massachusetts. One Grandmother had poor eyesight and hearing but lived a Successful life.
A Lovely Inconsequence
So inspiring Bruce!
Tracy
So lucky am I to have two women from “The Greatest Generation” as my dear friends.
Not prone to complaint, always looking on the bright side.
Truly an inspiration.
A Lovely Inconsequence
Yes Tracy! Cling to your memories of them!
Lorrie
A beautiful post, and an encouragement as we all begin to feel very weary with Covid restrictions combined with winter!
A Lovely Inconsequence
Thank you Lorrie!
LA CONTESSA
THANK YOU………I feel IAAM SLIPPING A BIT!
ONCE weDNESDAY IS BEHIND US I KNOW I WILL FEEL BETTER!
XX
A Lovely Inconsequence
Better days ahead Contessa…
Ann
What a beautiful post…your writing inspires, uplifts, and infuses us with courage for the days and years ahead. Standing on the shoulders of our grandmothers and “other mothers” we can do this – with grace and yes, courage. Thank you for your wonderful gift of writing that you share with us!
A Lovely Inconsequence
Thank you so much Ann!
Sam Davidson
This is one of the best things you’ve written, thank you for sharing your thoughts. Applicable to many people world wide, not just those living in the USA. But those of us who follow you from overseas (I am in Australia) are thinking of everyone in the US right now and hoping things take a turn for the better and soon. Sam.
A Lovely Inconsequence
Thank you Sam…that is the nicest thing you could say.
Karen
These thoughts have helped me this evening too. I was heading to bed early because, after a long and difficult day, it seemed like the most soothing thing to do. While shutting down my laptop, I saw this post. Thank you, for this story and for your inspiring words. I don’t feel brave either. I feel sad, lonely and isolated most of the time. Sometimes even frightened. Savouring the better moments, creating better moments and yes, washing the dishes is the path through. I live in Canada but my heart is with you for peace and safety this coming week.
xo The Other Karen
Karen Noske
Other Karen, thanks for sharing this. It’s wonderful to have a safe place to come to, isn’t it? XO
A Lovely Inconsequence
Thank you to both my Karen’s!
Karen
Oh, how timely and how beautifully put! I simply love this, it makes me want, to as my mother used to say, “rise to the occasion!” Like you, I have nothing but admiration for our fore-mothers who, in times of tremendous global and personal challenge, seemed to automatically assume that the thing to do was to forge ahead, bravely, and take it in their stride. So, they did!
Thank you so much for sharing these thoughts, they have helped me this evening! Well done, dear!!